As a kid watching movies with my mom always ended the same way, in tears.
She is such a magnificent woman with the sweetest soul and despite all odds, a cryer. Not just a sad cryer... a happy, mad, excited, stressed, inspired, proud, and just about any other emotion you could imagine cryer. As a kid I used to hate it, "Yesh, mom how are you crying again?" Although, as I grew I started to understand that I too am very similar as an emotional being. Now I realize its more of a sensitivity to atmosphere, and a tenderness to express that emotion. In my adult life I began to fall in love with romantic movies, I would dream myself into the movies the heart grasping grand acts of love, and the way that love always won. In no time at all I began to describe myself as a dreamer. My mom too was also a dreamer, always cutting out pictures to add to her dream journal packed full of dream gardens and travel destinations. I spend a decent amount of time letting my mind wander into the realms of they unknowns of my future. Sometimes I can see them as clear as a movie bring projected on the wall. I dream about buying a van and traveling the US looking to serve in Gods kingdom and encounter more people. I dream about backpacking the world, and holding orphans in my arms at the locations God will place me. And all of these dreams are so delightful, truly a sweet aroma. One of the most significant dreams I wonder is that of my life with my future husband. I think about what he will be like and envision our rug rats running around our tastefully designed home. I was at a worship conference this weekend, and the touring pastor said something that rocked me, He said, "How differently would you walk through your life if you lived as if you knew in your heart your dreams were destine to be reality" If God showed me a miniature movie of me and my future husband and our beautiful children, how would that change my current situation? How would that change the way I view myself? How would that change the dating "timeline" I have created for myself? How would that change my standard in the men I date? The truth is my loneliness would probably feel a little less lonely, because I would know that God has predestined and created someone just for me. Sometimes when I see attractive christian men, I think 'maybe he is the one'. I find myself striving to find fleshly accompaniment, and putting in work. I just imagine God looking at me like "Daughter, thats someone else's destiny, I created your partner just as I created you and I will connect you two on MY terms and MY time." Nevertheless that doesn't stop the devil from planting seeds of lies in my life. Sometimes I catch myself thinking, "you need to look for your man" "if you leave you could miss the opportunity to meet your future husband" "Paige, you're too broken to ever be loved by a man, or love a man" " Nobody will ever love you, the way he loves her" " I'm not beautiful enough to be loved by him" " I wont find a christian man who understands my unique relationship with God" The down right truth is these are all lies! Today I will RISE UP as the warrior woman I am and combat that fear with faith and say , "UMM, Heyy devil, you must not know me, but I am a daughter of the king of kings, and my daddy has a perfect PRINCE for me, a man who will treat me like the actual queen I was created to be' and until then I will date and love myself, because I already have love from the most important man in my life FORVER and ALWAYS, my savior and father" If we walk knowing that despite not seeing our future God has an unfathomable, Incredible future already planned for us. The future he planned is greater than even in our wildest dreams, and better than any romantic comedy we can watch on Netflix. And we need to learn to walk in the promises of God. Being said that Is easier that done. Here are some applicable ways I have decided to walk in faith recently. /// TRUST. In my first edit of my post trust wasn't first, which is the first place I went wrong. Trusting God with our whole lives is so crucial, because not only does he number your steps but he has far better plans for you than you can make for yourself. Trust God with your future husband. He knows you better than you do sometimes, and he will never leave you nor forsake you.\\\ /// PRAY FOR YOUR FUTURE HUSBAND. I have been praying that God protect him and grow him. That God begin to open doors and make a way in his life, stir a new passion for his calling, that god will cause him to have a new thirst that only a deeper relationship with the heavily father can quench. Ladies I am very single, I'm not praying for a man I know and have grow to love in this current tangible moment, but for the man I will one day love\\\\\ /// PRAY FOR YOURSELF. Although, I have been praying for my future man, I also think its incredibly important to pray over my own life, that God continue to heal past wounds and the untrust that I have towards men. I believe now is the most important time to deal with my heart issues or they will carry over into my marriage. I pray that God continue to grow me and prune me Into the woman of God that I am destined to be. That God reveal the parts of my life that need to change so that I can continue to press towards becoming the future woman, mother, and wife, he dreams about me to be.\\\ /// DONT FORGET YOUR VALUE. The last thing I did was get a token, a reminder of my worth and value. I bought a little ring that looks like a crown, it fits on my ring finger, and when I see it Im reminded that not only does God have my king out there but that I'm a Queen in the making, worthy of nothing less than a king. If you could see yourself the way God sees you, you're standards would be through the roof, and you would never settle because you are too beautiful, valued, smart, funny, talented, and anointed to settle for anything less than what God has for you. \\\\\ Keep your head up queens, and dream on. XOXO Jericho
1 Comment
Vera
2/16/2016 07:11:07 pm
Paige: You are crazy talented and amazing. I'm so grateful our paths crossed. Xoxo, Vera
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AuthorPerfectly imperfect artist, lover, musician, poet, worship leader, and above all daughter of the king of kings. Archives
December 2016
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